WHY, NEWT, Y'OLD HORNDOG

So it turns out Newt Gingrich was putting the pork sword to some woman not his wife while heading, you should pardon the expresion, the impeachment drive (sorry) back in 1998. Well, I was shocked, shocked to read about it, but apparently I missed this article in Salon way back then. The Avatar of Abstinence has had a tough time keeping his pants on since he was banging his geometry teacher in the 11th grade. This would actually improve my opinion of him a good deal if he hadn't handed his second wife divorce papers while she was hooked up to an IV drip.

I knew a guy in college who went around preaching this fidelity and monogamy thing, which was hard to do in the Woodstock era. He said it was a great way to get laid.